A few weeks back I summarily executed another relationship. This marked the fourth relationship in three years that I had ended within a week of the three-month mark. Which, let's be frank, is not a great looking stat to have on anyone's scoresheet. Either for me, or for the women I date. Each time, the girls have been lovely and beautiful and the sex has been magnificent. But still, each time, the three month mark rolls into view and suddenly my convictions . . .

It is a truth universally acknowledged that if, in the first three weeks of moving into your home, you do not unpack the cardboard box full of shoes, then you will become a person who keeps their shoes in a cardboard box. The ability to adapt has ensured the survival of the human race, but it can also get you into some fairly lunatic living patterns. My partner and I bought a tiny table-top ironing board when we moved into a large loft-style apartment with very high . . .